Two things happen when he's threatened
First the hiss, then the shell. When both happen at once the sound defies description, and no recording of it has survived.
Meme factory
Write your own snailcat
Type a top line and a bottom line; they land on the card as you go. Hang the good ones on the sidewalk wall, or hit random when nothing comes.
Take a screenshot to keep one — this page can't download files. Whatever you write stays in your browser, and the wall clears when you reload.
I'M IN A HURRY
I'VE BEEN ON THIS SIDEWALK FOR 3 HOURS
The sidewalk wall
Everything hung up so far
The creature's own archive. Anything you add goes to the front with an orange tag on it.
Field notes
From the observation log
Findings from a team that followed one specimen across wet pavement for three days. The team was never tired, only waiting.
Lettuce and wet food
He likes lettuce but refuses to let on. By the time he reaches the bowl the food has gone cold, which annoys him as a separate matter.
He does chase the laser
He reaches the spot where the light was by the following afternoon. Nobody has found a kind way to tell him.
The box problem is solved
An ordinary cat spends about six seconds getting into a box. This one spends six hours, and his house is already on his back so he doesn't need it. He gets in anyway.
The eyestalks report his mood
Stalks up: curious. Stalks tilted: sulking. Both stalks down: today is not a talking day.
How the nine lives are split
Seven on the cat side, two held in reserve inside the shell. The shell lives last considerably longer, because they don't do anything.
Public vote
What is this, exactly?
The scientific community split in two, then in four. Cast a vote and make it worse.
The thing in front of us is:
1,733 votes · you haven't voted yet
Frequently asked
Questions people keep sending
Is it a cat or a snail?
Yes.
Does the shell come off?
It does. The instant it comes off, the housing problem begins, and one look at rents in this city sends it straight back on.
Why does he always look so annoyed?
You'd look like that too if every trip took you four hours and the first thing anyone said on arrival was "what took you so long".
Litter box, or leaf?
Litter box. The leaf incident was a misunderstanding and he would like the subject closed.
If I feed him, will he come?
He will. You may have moved to another city by then.
Why is he wet?
There are two reasons and you want to hear neither of them. One of them is rain.